I found some old voicemails

I found some old voicemails

Almost forgotten ones, from when we were young.

I almost listened to that one you left

that summer I was away,

where you recounted

a superbly normal day

in that way

that made me light up

at your wonder of the world.

And then somewhere in the rambling

you’d pause,

and say “I miss you darlin”.

I almost listened.

—

I almost listened,

Not because I miss you,

Not because I want you back,

But because I want to remember

for a moment,

a version of you that doesn’t

make me ache.

That version of you that still saw

the wonder

in the present

and had hope

in the future.

You used to be so hopeful.

—

Even if I never listen again,

I’ll save those messages.

I guess it makes me feel better knowing

somewhere on this planet

that hopeful version of you still exists.

Even if only in those old voicemails.